Jesus and My Nap 180
By Jessica Brodie
“O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.”—Psalm 63:1 (ESV)
I’ve always hated naps. For as long as I can remember, unless I had the flu, was pregnant, or had a sleep-chaotic newborn in the house, I refused even the idea of a snooze.
“They make me nauseous,” I’d say.
It was true—I’d put my head down and wake up ten or twenty or sixty minutes later, and for the rest of the day, my stomach would be in knots.
And in truth, I had a bias about them, too. In my heart of hearts, I thought naps were for the lazy, for those who sat around eating chocolate and kicking up their feet, for those not driven to make their mark in the world as I was.
Oh, dear, naïve, and completely incorrect Younger Me…
In the last few years, I’ve discovered the power of naps both from a physical and mental health perspective.
More importantly, I’ve discovered how tied in naps are with my surrender to the Lord, to my relinquishment of control on the tight grip I hold on life.
I guess you could say I’ve done a nap-180, done a complete about-face on my former nap-hating perspective.
I’m not exactly sure when I discovered the power of naps, but I suspect my brain-shift happened shortly after Matt and I got married. See, I was always a workhorse before I had kids, but after I became a single mom with a demanding and wonderful full-time job, I’d often get by on four or five hours of sleep a night. “I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” I’d quip. If the sun was up—or the moon—there was work to do and adventures to be experienced.
But then came Matt, a partner to help with it all. Slowly, I relaxed. I didn’t have to do it all on my own. I started getting seven hours of sleep a night, then eight, then nine.
I began to heal and truly listen to my body. Before, when stress got overwhelming, I’d slug back some coffee and push through. Now, I became more introspective. I read the Bible more. I meditated on things like “surrender.”
One day, I was so overwhelmed with deadlines that I felt ill. I’d overcommitted (as usual!), and I felt frazzled and unfocused. I wanted to give my best work, but my brain just wasn’t working right. I was weepy and completely “off.”
So I left the office, went home, and slid fully dressed between the sheets. An hour later, I woke up.
And you know what? The sky hadn’t fallen because I’d taken a short break. My body and mind were refreshed and reset. I found I was no less productive because of it. (In fact, perhaps I was more productive.)
In essence, I “gave it over to God,” surrendering my will as I lay my head on that pillow.
Since then, I have come to genuinely enjoy naps. I try to keep them short, and I don’t nap every day. But if I get that familiar restlessness within my soul, that “everything depends on me and I have to do X, Y, Q, and Z now or this will happen!” feeling, that feeling that I want to binge on cereal until everything feels better, I’ve come to realize that’s my body and brain’s way of expressing overwhelm.
And when I feel that overwhelm, there’s only one solution: God.
I can’t fix everything, and cereal and excessive worry or control can’t make everything wrong in my life get better, or the deadlines disappear.
But God is at the helm of my ship. He’s in control, not me. I relinquish my life to Him.
In Isaiah 41:10, God reminds us, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (ESV).
God is in control, not me, and when I remember to nap instead of looking to myself to handle everything, it becomes—at least for me—an act of spiritual surrender.
I suspect King David understood this when he penned Psalm 63, which begins, “O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water” (Psalm 63:1 ESV).
Are you in a place where you find it hard to surrender to God or relinquish control? Is something about this devotional speaking to your heart?
I invite you to pray, and let God take over.
A prayer: Holy Lord, thank You for your righteous and loving control over all things. You created this world, and You created me. Help me take comfort in the pure knowledge that in You, I am safe. No matter what happens in this life, in You I have eternal salvation because I trust in You and I accept and follow Your son, Jesus Christ, as my savior. I love You, Lord. Amen.
